*sigh* Oh, the world we live in...

Okay, Let me just start by saying: What the Hell?

I had someone with whom I went to school take issue over the fact that I only responded to her facebook posts about the president, as though I simply searched my friend's facebook walls looking for pro-Obama stuff about which to offer a countering opinion. Her other posts frequently had to do with her kids (who I would likely never meet), where she was getting coffee of cupcakes for the day in Washington DC (200 miles away from me), or trying to organize a girl's night out.

Maybe it's just me, but would you comment about things which are of no interest to you? I didn't comment on most of her other postings because they are just not things that I care about.

Now, that's not to say I 'm not going to comment on (or at least "like") a picture of a kid, but with more than 100 friends, occasionally something like that might slip through the cracks. Lord knows, I post enough things on my own wall that pass without comment. But I'm not about to call a friend out for not commenting on every little thing I post.

On the left, stuff I care about. On the right, stuff you post on facebook. Notice how they intersect? That's the stuff I comment about. It's like this for EVERY PERSON. Any questions?

I share links to news stories, links to this blog, pictures of my kids, pictures of my cats, random thoughts, or movie quotes. And I have many friends who don't comment on them. Hell, I have some friends who don't comment on anything but political posts. And I'm okay with that.

Maybe it's because I don't have the constant need for validation of everything I do. I work for a company the recycles used oil. I could go on and on about things that go on there (seriously, some days it's like a frickin' soap opera), but I know that most people won't care about such things. That is one of the biggest reasons I don't frequently gripe about work on my facebook wall. I don't want people thinking that I'm just interested in posting about my self-centered, vapid (if you don't know what it means, I suggest you look it up. It is a word that should be in greater use than it is, and is not nearly as insulting as people want to make it out to be) existence.

If I'm gonna post something on facebook, I'm gonna make sure it is at least marginally interesting to someone besides me, or at the very least allows for some commiseration.

When I know people posting the latest deals about a Mommy-and-Me inspired Living Social wannabee website that has a "deal" for a spa getaway for "only" $398, I sort of feel a little disconnected. In situations where people don't have the money to toss away "just because you deserve it", that $400 can buy a hundred gallons of home heating oil to keep a home and family warm for a couple of months.

Really, I know which one some people might LIKE, but I also know which one people who live in the REAL world end up having to choose.

And really, I think that's why there seems to be a disconnect. It's not a "1% versus the 99%" sort of thing. It's a real world versus "Stepford Wives" sort of thing. The site I described above is a deal site that is "for moms, by moms", and actually has that spa thing, described in the words used above. Because every mom has the ability to do things "just for them". Now, I know that most (if not all) moms would LIKE things like that, but for those who don't live as suburban trophy wives, in the present economy, that is just simply not practical. Yet sites such as the one I describe exist, as though the economy is a concern for someone else.

Which brings me back to my point. When you post about something on facebook, you are telling the world "This is something I care about. I want you to comment on it, and show me how much you care about it too". This is not a bad thing. It's social interaction in the digital age, and a new way to spread word of mouth.

But something that you need to remember, is that not everyone is going to give a rat's hind-quarters for everything you do. That is also social interaction. When I am sitting in the same room with friends (even with strangers), I tend to not pay attention to things that don't concern me. I pay attention to things people say in conversation with me, and offer little to no comment on topics that either do not apply to me, or I have no shared interest in. A couple of friends talking government employee shop, or women friends discussing Twilight rarely get commentary from me, as a couple of for instances (outside of maybe a comment about how vampires are not supposed to sparkle in the sunlight, and rather burst into painful flames).

I extend this into on-line social interactions as well. If anything I tend to go FURTHER, and stand silent on many topics for a lack of interest.

But if you post about something that I DO have an opinion about, I'm gonna comment. That's just how the world works. People speak about things that interest them. It's not up to you (or your friends) to comment on how it seems "disrespectful" that a person picks what to offer commentary on.

The end result of the interaction that started all this nonsense is that she threatened to "limit what I could see" on her wall, and her friends chiming in about how respect enters into things. If you think you have to "limit" a person's ability to interact with you, then maybe you are better off not having that person as a friend, even in the fast-and-loose way that facebook defines that word. I removed that person as a "friend", and may see some fallout from some mutual friends as a result.

But, like "real life" social interactions, people will decide what "side" to take. If I end up losing the ability to interact with some people as a result, I see that as more their thing than mine. I exited the scene in order to put a stop to the "drama" that shows up so frequently on-line.

I just wish that some people didn't treat facebook as some sort of psudo-psychotic extension of high school cliques.